La fleshlight et le spam n’étaient peut-être pas inventés en 1979, mais certains besoins méritaient quand même d’être comblés. Trois publicités de cette année-là.

How Would You Like An Instant Blowjob?
If you’ve ever had a pair of soft, supple, wet lips and a slithering tongue doing their thing on you where it feels best, you know how it’s a sensation that’s hard to beat! Now you can enjoy even more pleasurable sucking-like sensations any time you wish …and at a price less than half what you’d expect!
It’s no secret …the SUCK-U-TRON is a knock-off! The original (with a similar name) was invented by a competitor of ours. He charges $24.95. But using computer technology, we’ve learned to make the same kind of device for less than half. So now if you’d like to have that oral loving feeling anytime you get in the mood, you need not pay $24.95, because we charge only $9.95.
The SUCK-U-TRON can give you the exotic feeling of an expert blowjob. In fact, it’s even better because it has a built-in humming, vibrating action to send you up the wall. You control how fast it sucks and hums… a teasing, toying, drawn out orgy of ecstasy, or a lightning rocket ride to ball blasting release. So if you want a blowjob and can’t wait till the right girl comes along, you need the SUCK-U-TRON.
Get one for a friend, too. 10% discount when you buy 2 or more.

Announcing… THE REAL FEEL
At Last! They’ve finally done it! After years of research and testing we’re able to offer a vibrating vagina so perfect, so indistinguishable from the real thing, that if you can tell the difference with your eyes closed we’ll refund your money — and no questions asked! Everything — the pink tint, the soft, inviting texture, the moistness and perfect body temperature — make this marvelous new nighttime companion shockingly true-to-life!
What’s more, her variable vibrations will bring you to a frenzy of delight! And a special pneumatic device lets her ‘squeeze’ with those wonderful contractions belonging only to the best of the world’s courtesans.
Put us to the test. Try ‘The Real Feel’ in the privacy of your own home for 14 days.
Valentine Products, Inc.

ELECTRO POCKET PUSSY always ready, vibrating sensation, looks & feels like the real thing. Now only $9.95. Save $10 thru this ad only. Sent in Plain Wrapper.
BE A BETTER LOVER! No pills – No Gimmicks.
Simply apply cream and soft latex supplement over head of penis.
ENLARGE YOUR PENIS… SECRETELY. Add inches immediately. Only $4.95. No one will know except you!
PORNO BOOKS! Capri products. The original Hard-on makers. Teen girls who are violated by their fathers.
ANIMAL LUST. All 3 only $2.